• Mike Eshelman

You will always have the correct amount of change for the last show

Updated: Feb 17, 2018

But never the one you're at. If you actually plan ahead and go to the bank for a proper change amount, everyone will charge. If you wing it and just show up, that's when people will pull out their crumpled twenties wanting change. It's not you, it's the universe.

I once had a guy buy a $5 piece the first few minutes of a show, and wanted to pay with a hundred dollar bill. Why do you have have a hundred dollar bill at 10:00AM on a Saturday? You didn't cash pull that from an ATM, you went out of your way to be inconvenient. Or you're a counterfeiter. Either way, I wasn't going to lose the first sale of the day, that is a recipe for disaster. So I gave him practically my entire change fund for the weekend. Now I was stuck with this potentially fake bill, like a curse passed on that nobody deserves.

I bought a sandwich with it. Not because I wanted a sandwich, but I wanted the smaller bills. And I wanted to be rid of any potential curses. Nobody should be burdened with that. Well, not even the poor schmuck that sold me the sandwich, but that was now his problem. Not mine.

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